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I could literally feel my blood boiling. Maybe it was the 90 degree weather. Maybe it was the games. Whatever it was, Icee’s certainly weren't cooling
me down.
This past Sunday I attended the Yankees\Devil Rays game at Yankee Stadium. While the experience was amazing (my last day game ever at Yankee
Stadium; my first ever visit to Monument Park; Jeter tying Gherig’s record of most hits ever at Yankee Stadium; potentially the last ever Yankee grand
slam at Yankee Stadium; Jason’s obsession with the Icee man that literally made the guy in the last row of the stadium ask him to sit down), I became a
crazed man about five minutes before the first pitch. At 1pmET, the football games began and I fired my BlackBerry up.
Seriously – why spend $40 to watch baseball and then spend the whole time looking at football scores? I HAVE NO IDEA! All I know is that by the time
we left the game (Yankee’s leading heading into the 9th), the updates couldn't come fast enough. First it was Kitna’s two TD passes. Then his three
INT’s (which in my head meant he only had two TD passes - do the math, it works). I kept pleading with the BlackBerry to show me something good on
my team. Nothing worked. Apparently. My blood was literally boiling. I was sure Jason was going to have to call the trainer out to help me (although I
think he was too busy with Pavano – actually shout out to the Yankee fans, of whom I usually hate: When the trainer came out to look at Carl they
booed incessantly. When he left the game, they booed louder. And then, as he approached the dugout, they applauded as if to say “WHAT THE
FUCK! But ok, glad you’re alright”)
Anyhow, enough about me. How did you do this week?
Tools Eat Crow As Double G Dominates
While I was getting worked up about Scott hating on my team, he, apparently, was getting worked up about being called a dud on the Brockast. So to
shut people up, he sent Kitna, Portis and Megatron out into the field to double up on their touchdowns. It was a dominate performance by a team that
came out of the gate limping. He has certainly made a statement to the rest of the league: Don’t think I’m going to be the pushover team of 2009.
As for me, it was a lousy experience. I benched Bruce who had ZERO catches in week 1 in favor of Michael Jenkins. Turns out that my bench WR’s
combined for 30+ points while Jenkins had ZERO this week. Awesome. Bad starts at QB and WR (and a pathetic showing by Larry Johnson… by the
way – since I couldn't see the game or access the Internet I was CONVINCED that Johnson had gone down with a season ending injury. Seeing that
he's ok and was just shut down doesn't necessarily make me feel better) all contributed to a lackluster day.
Tanks Edge Out Stare to Remian Top “J”
What to say? Cantor had a day. Sherman had a better one. Thanks to some help from Umpire Hochuli - who's poor call allowed Cutler to throw a
touchdown pass rather than fumble - Sherman was able to pull off the 4-point win. And while Sherman's team was supported by a 42-point day from
Cutler (is he the Brady of '08), you have to point out the inefficiency of Tomlinson. Is this toe thing going to be a problem all year? And if so, what do
you do? Bench him???
As for Cantor, props on a solid performance. Two close losses can be disappointing, but a 114-point day isn't. Bright light of Rivers, Peterson and Holt
(finally) will even out with Harrison and Grant soon enough.
Nomads Win as the Nose Dives
Where have you gone Jarrett Blass? After two back-to-back playoff seasons, your team faltered in 2007 with a 5-8 record and just two games into
2008, you have the least points scored in the league, have failed to go over 75-points both weeks and in week two posted the lowest point total in
ROFFL since Brock’s Week 10 crash last year when he scored 55.56 points. At least his was tucked in between two 150+ point games. So where do
you go from here? Well good news – Steve Smith is back. Roeth continues to shine in Pitt and you have to figure Indy will get their act together soon
(although losing Sanders for 6 weeks doesn't help). Hope is on the way. Just look at Nomads: After a 85-point week one showing, his team sprung into
action on the back of Brandon Marshall's record tying day (and 35-point performance). If that doesn't make you excited to see Smith return, nothing
will.
Pigs Continue To Post Big Numbers as B’Day Falls Short
Does Parker remind anyone of the New York Giants? He sneaks into the playoffs last year with a less then impressive record and then dominates the
playoffs capping it off with a small victory over a powerful opponent. Cut to 2008 where he has shown complete dominance with back-to-back wins over
his opponents by 25-points. Have we just begun the Deay Dynasty?
As for Brian, he’s team was spunky with all but 3 players going over 10-points. Had Berrian gotten on the board and one player been “spectacular” (as
in "going above and beyond predictions") it could have been a different game. Sure it was a loss, but B’Day still scares me.
Crabs Secure VA’s First ROFFL Win, Even If It Was By Just 0.36 Points
Right off the bat, here it is: Congrats Chris “VA” Rosenthall on his first ROFFL win. His Week 2 win makes his the third rookie to start the season 1-1
(only Jarrett came out of the gate swinging, winning his first three). I’m sure you owe a special thanks to Keeper Terrell Owens whose 20 points helped
fight off a Felix Jones kick return. Congrats buddy and welcome to the win column in 2009.
Speaking of the “W” column, where is Josh? His teams have never started the season 0-2 and with his team posting back-to-back sub 100-point
games (Josh has never scored less than 100 in both week one and two games since 2003), it’s looking bad for Coffee this season. And with Soaring
Pigs on the horizon, it may not get any better. Note to the Lukins: Maybe a move back to the East Coast is in order.
Born Wins, Even If He Thinks He Sucks
Six players on Rich’s team suck. Luckily the Giants D, Tony Romo and Greg Jennings are not in those six. After two weeks all three of them have
shown they can put up the numbers in barrels. If Rich can get Shockey, James, Fargas (McFadden isn't helping, is he) and Housh off the ground,
Rich's team could get much better. An early season predictions: Rich will be fighting for that 8th spot in 11 weeks… and he’ll get it.
As for the team he beat, well you have to cut them a break. First off Nick lost Shaub and Heap at the last second thanks to Hurricane Ike and had to
replace them with Huard (who went down, but not before losing Nick points) and Royal (who did zip). I still like Nick’s team (especially that WR core
which posed a combined 44-points for him) and am looking for him to rebound in week three. And hey Nick – if you ever could do with a slow week
from Jacobs\Parker, this was it.
Bandits Squeak Out His First Win Against A Powerful Jacobins
To echo Dave’s words: “with or without Brady. 121 points minus a quarterback.” Nice job, Dave. The facts are this: 60% of your point total came from
three players – Chamber's 21, Barber's 23 and GB’s 28. Good days from Witten and Toomer contributed. It’s impressive.
Unfortunately you played Brock this week and his less than one point victory came thanks to Anquan Boldin’s 33 and solid performances from
Graham, Stewart, Winslow and the Arizona D. Like Dave, Brock has a weakness at QB. Both need to figure out how to get solid points out of QB’s that
“manage the game” and don’t dominate (a la Rivers or Cutler). I like both of these teams but think they may have posted more this week then they will
typically.
Best of luck to everyone this week.
Swami, 3-4 last week, will be have predictions entered by the Saturday night
me down.
This past Sunday I attended the Yankees\Devil Rays game at Yankee Stadium. While the experience was amazing (my last day game ever at Yankee
Stadium; my first ever visit to Monument Park; Jeter tying Gherig’s record of most hits ever at Yankee Stadium; potentially the last ever Yankee grand
slam at Yankee Stadium; Jason’s obsession with the Icee man that literally made the guy in the last row of the stadium ask him to sit down), I became a
crazed man about five minutes before the first pitch. At 1pmET, the football games began and I fired my BlackBerry up.
Seriously – why spend $40 to watch baseball and then spend the whole time looking at football scores? I HAVE NO IDEA! All I know is that by the time
we left the game (Yankee’s leading heading into the 9th), the updates couldn't come fast enough. First it was Kitna’s two TD passes. Then his three
INT’s (which in my head meant he only had two TD passes - do the math, it works). I kept pleading with the BlackBerry to show me something good on
my team. Nothing worked. Apparently. My blood was literally boiling. I was sure Jason was going to have to call the trainer out to help me (although I
think he was too busy with Pavano – actually shout out to the Yankee fans, of whom I usually hate: When the trainer came out to look at Carl they
booed incessantly. When he left the game, they booed louder. And then, as he approached the dugout, they applauded as if to say “WHAT THE
FUCK! But ok, glad you’re alright”)
Anyhow, enough about me. How did you do this week?
Tools Eat Crow As Double G Dominates
While I was getting worked up about Scott hating on my team, he, apparently, was getting worked up about being called a dud on the Brockast. So to
shut people up, he sent Kitna, Portis and Megatron out into the field to double up on their touchdowns. It was a dominate performance by a team that
came out of the gate limping. He has certainly made a statement to the rest of the league: Don’t think I’m going to be the pushover team of 2009.
As for me, it was a lousy experience. I benched Bruce who had ZERO catches in week 1 in favor of Michael Jenkins. Turns out that my bench WR’s
combined for 30+ points while Jenkins had ZERO this week. Awesome. Bad starts at QB and WR (and a pathetic showing by Larry Johnson… by the
way – since I couldn't see the game or access the Internet I was CONVINCED that Johnson had gone down with a season ending injury. Seeing that
he's ok and was just shut down doesn't necessarily make me feel better) all contributed to a lackluster day.
Tanks Edge Out Stare to Remian Top “J”
What to say? Cantor had a day. Sherman had a better one. Thanks to some help from Umpire Hochuli - who's poor call allowed Cutler to throw a
touchdown pass rather than fumble - Sherman was able to pull off the 4-point win. And while Sherman's team was supported by a 42-point day from
Cutler (is he the Brady of '08), you have to point out the inefficiency of Tomlinson. Is this toe thing going to be a problem all year? And if so, what do
you do? Bench him???
As for Cantor, props on a solid performance. Two close losses can be disappointing, but a 114-point day isn't. Bright light of Rivers, Peterson and Holt
(finally) will even out with Harrison and Grant soon enough.
Nomads Win as the Nose Dives
Where have you gone Jarrett Blass? After two back-to-back playoff seasons, your team faltered in 2007 with a 5-8 record and just two games into
2008, you have the least points scored in the league, have failed to go over 75-points both weeks and in week two posted the lowest point total in
ROFFL since Brock’s Week 10 crash last year when he scored 55.56 points. At least his was tucked in between two 150+ point games. So where do
you go from here? Well good news – Steve Smith is back. Roeth continues to shine in Pitt and you have to figure Indy will get their act together soon
(although losing Sanders for 6 weeks doesn't help). Hope is on the way. Just look at Nomads: After a 85-point week one showing, his team sprung into
action on the back of Brandon Marshall's record tying day (and 35-point performance). If that doesn't make you excited to see Smith return, nothing
will.
Pigs Continue To Post Big Numbers as B’Day Falls Short
Does Parker remind anyone of the New York Giants? He sneaks into the playoffs last year with a less then impressive record and then dominates the
playoffs capping it off with a small victory over a powerful opponent. Cut to 2008 where he has shown complete dominance with back-to-back wins over
his opponents by 25-points. Have we just begun the Deay Dynasty?
As for Brian, he’s team was spunky with all but 3 players going over 10-points. Had Berrian gotten on the board and one player been “spectacular” (as
in "going above and beyond predictions") it could have been a different game. Sure it was a loss, but B’Day still scares me.
Crabs Secure VA’s First ROFFL Win, Even If It Was By Just 0.36 Points
Right off the bat, here it is: Congrats Chris “VA” Rosenthall on his first ROFFL win. His Week 2 win makes his the third rookie to start the season 1-1
(only Jarrett came out of the gate swinging, winning his first three). I’m sure you owe a special thanks to Keeper Terrell Owens whose 20 points helped
fight off a Felix Jones kick return. Congrats buddy and welcome to the win column in 2009.
Speaking of the “W” column, where is Josh? His teams have never started the season 0-2 and with his team posting back-to-back sub 100-point
games (Josh has never scored less than 100 in both week one and two games since 2003), it’s looking bad for Coffee this season. And with Soaring
Pigs on the horizon, it may not get any better. Note to the Lukins: Maybe a move back to the East Coast is in order.
Born Wins, Even If He Thinks He Sucks
Six players on Rich’s team suck. Luckily the Giants D, Tony Romo and Greg Jennings are not in those six. After two weeks all three of them have
shown they can put up the numbers in barrels. If Rich can get Shockey, James, Fargas (McFadden isn't helping, is he) and Housh off the ground,
Rich's team could get much better. An early season predictions: Rich will be fighting for that 8th spot in 11 weeks… and he’ll get it.
As for the team he beat, well you have to cut them a break. First off Nick lost Shaub and Heap at the last second thanks to Hurricane Ike and had to
replace them with Huard (who went down, but not before losing Nick points) and Royal (who did zip). I still like Nick’s team (especially that WR core
which posed a combined 44-points for him) and am looking for him to rebound in week three. And hey Nick – if you ever could do with a slow week
from Jacobs\Parker, this was it.
Bandits Squeak Out His First Win Against A Powerful Jacobins
To echo Dave’s words: “with or without Brady. 121 points minus a quarterback.” Nice job, Dave. The facts are this: 60% of your point total came from
three players – Chamber's 21, Barber's 23 and GB’s 28. Good days from Witten and Toomer contributed. It’s impressive.
Unfortunately you played Brock this week and his less than one point victory came thanks to Anquan Boldin’s 33 and solid performances from
Graham, Stewart, Winslow and the Arizona D. Like Dave, Brock has a weakness at QB. Both need to figure out how to get solid points out of QB’s that
“manage the game” and don’t dominate (a la Rivers or Cutler). I like both of these teams but think they may have posted more this week then they will
typically.
Best of luck to everyone this week.
Swami, 3-4 last week, will be have predictions entered by the Saturday night