| Week 3 Published September 27 |
QUICK NOTES
1. Congratulations to the winners of week 3
2. Quote of the week, from 12 Angry Men (on my top 20 all-time list)
“Juror #6: You a Yankee fan?”
“Juror #5: No, Baltimore.”
“Juror #6: Baltimore? That's like being hit in the head with a crow bar once a day.”
3. The Good Looking Quote of Last Week: “With a possible weapon like Eric Johnson about to come off
the injured list Watson’s team might get much better (but don’t forget that I said that for 10 weeks last year
concerning Todd Heap).”
4. Top 4 seasons: Fall, Winter, Spring, Summer (that’s it, that’s the list)
5. I really want to see that movie, “Serenity.”
6. I will never admit that any of you are better looking then me.
HANDSOME (BEAUTIFUL) BROCK’S BANDITS (last week: BROCK'S BANDITS)
Until he loses Brock, nice ass and all, doesn’t move from this spot. Shaun Alexander is a touchdown freak and
literally gives Brock 35 point score every week. Greg Lewis is doing better than I thought and Branch and Big Game
round out a pretty good set of receivers. I expect Brady to put up 18 pt weeks consistently and most importantly,
Brock has the best running back situation in the league.
HOT BRICK WALLS AND TREES (last week: BRICK WALLS AND TREES )
Good thing you kept Brian Westbrook and LaMont Jordan. Still, the wide outs are the Achilles heel of this team,
Reggie Wayne has suffered as Indy’s offense has suffered and Scotty Watts doesn’t have much depth in that area.
He still gets big number from Marc Bulger and those two backs. It’ll be hard for me to beat him this week, good luck
big guy.
SEXY NOMADS IN THE DEEP (last week: NEW JERESEY JACOBINS)
The champ is scaring me. I wanted to be the first one to win twice. However, with the best receiver so far this year,
Steve Smith (putting up Drew Bennett numbers) and 3 starting running backs + the obvious keeper (LJ) Navid is
setting himself up for a nice run in the ’05 playoffs. Two concerns, Michael Clayton, bust? Matt Hasselbeck, good?
These questions will be answered in the next couple of weeks.
GOOD-LOOKING BLADE BROWN (last week: BALTIMORE TOOLS)
Kerry Collins has not thrown an interception this year. Things are looking B. Smooth for B. Young, Ronnie Brown’s
breakout game could supply Brian a lot of depth at the RB spot and with Isaac Bruce injured, Kevin Curtis becomes a
better fantasy play. You heard it here first, G. Money vs. Blade Brown in the finals.
CUTE NEW JERSEY JACOBINS (last week: BLADE BROWN)
Dave suffered a bit with Tiki having a very average week. The good news for Dave is that Droughns has been given
the starting job in Cleveland so at least he can start him for now and not worry about using 2nd string backs. The
Giants defensive run might be over but Dave wide receivers put up consistent numbers. I’m not totally sold on Dave’
s team, but it’s a quantum leap from his ’04 squad.
ATTRACTIVE COLT .45’s (last week: NOSE)
In a rough week (both of his starting running backs were down) G. Money got a huge win. Now, barring injury, Portis
and Jones will be starting throughout the season. Despite the inconsistency, Brett Favre still puts up numbers and
Chad Johnson is now the third best receiver in football behind only Moss and Owens. This prediction will change 4
or 5 times, but I’m calling Gregg, whether you want to have sex with him or not, to win it all.
DECENT NOSE (last week: NOMADS IN THE DEEP)
Jarrett now has the same problem he had last year… no second running back. He looks good at wide out, tight end,
great at quarterback and has the second highest scoring kicker in the league. Steven Jackson is a viable #1 back
but JJ and Marcel aren’t going to cut it as a #2. JB’s team might meet the same fate as my squad last year, 8-5, but
couldn’t hang in the playoffs because I was starting Ty Wheatley.
EH MARRIED WITH RAVENS (last week: BORN TO RUN MY MOUTH)
Despite the loss, and the performance by Willie Parker, I don’t think it’s time for Lukin to panic. Parker will be fine,
Thomas Jones is a good fill-in anyway and Willis McGahee played like he’s supposed to this week. And of course,
Daunte Culpepper played great, which has to happen for Lukin to be competitive. Despite the risk, Plaxico Burress
was a nice pick and Lukin is pretty set at wide receiver.
NOT INTERESTED DUCKVILLE QUACKERS (last week: MARRIED WITH RAVENS)
After Parker and I embarrassed ourselves in week 2 we both came up gold in week 3. Parker’s team just got a huge
upgrade with the news that Mewelde Moore will be starting in Minnesota from now on. If Andre Johnson finally starts
to break out with a new offensive coordinator Parker’s team is going to be very, very good.
IF I HAD A FEW DRINKS IN ME BALTIMORE TOOLS (last week: DUCKVILLE QUACKERS)
The commish was right… Big Ben is a better play than Trent Green, apparently every week. True Marc had his wide
outs on the bye week but the issue for Marc will be one Edge and Curtis go on bye, there’s not much depth in that
position for him. Here’s a type for you, you can’t be successful with two Jets on your team.
NOT GOOD LOOKING BORN TO RUN MY MOUTH (last week: COLT .45’S)
The problem for Kiss is that apparently, Ahman Green is done. No matter what happens Carnell Williams is a dream
keeper and Donovan McNabb is the best fantasy quarterback this year with Daunte and Manning struggling. I’m not
saying Kiss won’t make the playoffs, what I am saying is that Eli and Williams could be great keepers for Cajun Kiss in
’06.
ONLY FOR $1 MILLION FIVE SECOND STARE (last week: SHERMTANKS)
I had a very big week. But I’m still not that confident in my team. Despite the point total, the truth is I’m starting
Galloway, Keyshawn and Travis Taylor (none of which I planned on starting after my draft). Kevan Barlow has gotten
progressively better from week 1 to 3, so I’m hoping there’s room for me there. Oh, and Tomlinson is good.
IF I WAS BLIND SHERMTANKS (last week: FIVE SECOND STARE)
Something is up here. Jason has not picked up a single player and is 0-3. Either he knows something we don’t or….
Fuck it, I think he knows something we don’t. I don’t like this one bit. But if we’re simply looking at this team right, it’s
looking pretty bad. His running backs totaled .27 points last week, this week he takes the Hoegarddens approach by
starting two running backs on the same team. I still think Payton and Jamal will finish the strong. Has to happen
soon though, or Jay will miss the playoffs for the first time.
GROSS PROPAGADA (last week: PROPAGANDA)
Poor Nick, I’d feel worse if he wasn’t happy with his girlfriend and going to London. What can you say about the team
though? Michael Vick reminds of when I was 12-years old in camp. I used to play baseball and slide all over the
place. The next day I’d have these cool scabs on my knee and shoulders. Michael Vick is like the scabs on my knee
when I was 12-years old, I was tempted to pick ‘em even though I knew it was a bad idea and I picked them off every
time. I still have scars on my knee. And no, I have nothing else to say about Nick’s team.
1. Congratulations to the winners of week 3
2. Quote of the week, from 12 Angry Men (on my top 20 all-time list)
“Juror #6: You a Yankee fan?”
“Juror #5: No, Baltimore.”
“Juror #6: Baltimore? That's like being hit in the head with a crow bar once a day.”
3. The Good Looking Quote of Last Week: “With a possible weapon like Eric Johnson about to come off
the injured list Watson’s team might get much better (but don’t forget that I said that for 10 weeks last year
concerning Todd Heap).”
4. Top 4 seasons: Fall, Winter, Spring, Summer (that’s it, that’s the list)
5. I really want to see that movie, “Serenity.”
6. I will never admit that any of you are better looking then me.
HANDSOME (BEAUTIFUL) BROCK’S BANDITS (last week: BROCK'S BANDITS)
Until he loses Brock, nice ass and all, doesn’t move from this spot. Shaun Alexander is a touchdown freak and
literally gives Brock 35 point score every week. Greg Lewis is doing better than I thought and Branch and Big Game
round out a pretty good set of receivers. I expect Brady to put up 18 pt weeks consistently and most importantly,
Brock has the best running back situation in the league.
HOT BRICK WALLS AND TREES (last week: BRICK WALLS AND TREES )
Good thing you kept Brian Westbrook and LaMont Jordan. Still, the wide outs are the Achilles heel of this team,
Reggie Wayne has suffered as Indy’s offense has suffered and Scotty Watts doesn’t have much depth in that area.
He still gets big number from Marc Bulger and those two backs. It’ll be hard for me to beat him this week, good luck
big guy.
SEXY NOMADS IN THE DEEP (last week: NEW JERESEY JACOBINS)
The champ is scaring me. I wanted to be the first one to win twice. However, with the best receiver so far this year,
Steve Smith (putting up Drew Bennett numbers) and 3 starting running backs + the obvious keeper (LJ) Navid is
setting himself up for a nice run in the ’05 playoffs. Two concerns, Michael Clayton, bust? Matt Hasselbeck, good?
These questions will be answered in the next couple of weeks.
GOOD-LOOKING BLADE BROWN (last week: BALTIMORE TOOLS)
Kerry Collins has not thrown an interception this year. Things are looking B. Smooth for B. Young, Ronnie Brown’s
breakout game could supply Brian a lot of depth at the RB spot and with Isaac Bruce injured, Kevin Curtis becomes a
better fantasy play. You heard it here first, G. Money vs. Blade Brown in the finals.
CUTE NEW JERSEY JACOBINS (last week: BLADE BROWN)
Dave suffered a bit with Tiki having a very average week. The good news for Dave is that Droughns has been given
the starting job in Cleveland so at least he can start him for now and not worry about using 2nd string backs. The
Giants defensive run might be over but Dave wide receivers put up consistent numbers. I’m not totally sold on Dave’
s team, but it’s a quantum leap from his ’04 squad.
ATTRACTIVE COLT .45’s (last week: NOSE)
In a rough week (both of his starting running backs were down) G. Money got a huge win. Now, barring injury, Portis
and Jones will be starting throughout the season. Despite the inconsistency, Brett Favre still puts up numbers and
Chad Johnson is now the third best receiver in football behind only Moss and Owens. This prediction will change 4
or 5 times, but I’m calling Gregg, whether you want to have sex with him or not, to win it all.
DECENT NOSE (last week: NOMADS IN THE DEEP)
Jarrett now has the same problem he had last year… no second running back. He looks good at wide out, tight end,
great at quarterback and has the second highest scoring kicker in the league. Steven Jackson is a viable #1 back
but JJ and Marcel aren’t going to cut it as a #2. JB’s team might meet the same fate as my squad last year, 8-5, but
couldn’t hang in the playoffs because I was starting Ty Wheatley.
EH MARRIED WITH RAVENS (last week: BORN TO RUN MY MOUTH)
Despite the loss, and the performance by Willie Parker, I don’t think it’s time for Lukin to panic. Parker will be fine,
Thomas Jones is a good fill-in anyway and Willis McGahee played like he’s supposed to this week. And of course,
Daunte Culpepper played great, which has to happen for Lukin to be competitive. Despite the risk, Plaxico Burress
was a nice pick and Lukin is pretty set at wide receiver.
NOT INTERESTED DUCKVILLE QUACKERS (last week: MARRIED WITH RAVENS)
After Parker and I embarrassed ourselves in week 2 we both came up gold in week 3. Parker’s team just got a huge
upgrade with the news that Mewelde Moore will be starting in Minnesota from now on. If Andre Johnson finally starts
to break out with a new offensive coordinator Parker’s team is going to be very, very good.
IF I HAD A FEW DRINKS IN ME BALTIMORE TOOLS (last week: DUCKVILLE QUACKERS)
The commish was right… Big Ben is a better play than Trent Green, apparently every week. True Marc had his wide
outs on the bye week but the issue for Marc will be one Edge and Curtis go on bye, there’s not much depth in that
position for him. Here’s a type for you, you can’t be successful with two Jets on your team.
NOT GOOD LOOKING BORN TO RUN MY MOUTH (last week: COLT .45’S)
The problem for Kiss is that apparently, Ahman Green is done. No matter what happens Carnell Williams is a dream
keeper and Donovan McNabb is the best fantasy quarterback this year with Daunte and Manning struggling. I’m not
saying Kiss won’t make the playoffs, what I am saying is that Eli and Williams could be great keepers for Cajun Kiss in
’06.
ONLY FOR $1 MILLION FIVE SECOND STARE (last week: SHERMTANKS)
I had a very big week. But I’m still not that confident in my team. Despite the point total, the truth is I’m starting
Galloway, Keyshawn and Travis Taylor (none of which I planned on starting after my draft). Kevan Barlow has gotten
progressively better from week 1 to 3, so I’m hoping there’s room for me there. Oh, and Tomlinson is good.
IF I WAS BLIND SHERMTANKS (last week: FIVE SECOND STARE)
Something is up here. Jason has not picked up a single player and is 0-3. Either he knows something we don’t or….
Fuck it, I think he knows something we don’t. I don’t like this one bit. But if we’re simply looking at this team right, it’s
looking pretty bad. His running backs totaled .27 points last week, this week he takes the Hoegarddens approach by
starting two running backs on the same team. I still think Payton and Jamal will finish the strong. Has to happen
soon though, or Jay will miss the playoffs for the first time.
GROSS PROPAGADA (last week: PROPAGANDA)
Poor Nick, I’d feel worse if he wasn’t happy with his girlfriend and going to London. What can you say about the team
though? Michael Vick reminds of when I was 12-years old in camp. I used to play baseball and slide all over the
place. The next day I’d have these cool scabs on my knee and shoulders. Michael Vick is like the scabs on my knee
when I was 12-years old, I was tempted to pick ‘em even though I knew it was a bad idea and I picked them off every
time. I still have scars on my knee. And no, I have nothing else to say about Nick’s team.
